Post by Host Kyle on Jan 20, 2006 13:23:47 GMT -5
I debated on whether or not I would do these again since I felt my perspective might very well be crammed down your throats because I happen to be writing the episodes. I mean, come on. My perspective is the only 100% accurate perspective that I have to publish. Everyone else I glean from the context of dialogue and conent of confessionals. They say a lot, but they don't say everything.
Another reason I decided to continue with these is because I enjoyed doing them. It was a release for me and I know at least some people enjoyed reading them. Furthemore, I like to keep a consistancy with a legacy or a series, if you will.
So I shall.
First let me say, that I discovered something that I never before understood. The inclination toward aliases. I have often harped on Beth about why she doesn't usually play as herself...and here I have discovered why. Jamie further sealed this to me after an intense discussion we had last night. You make a character out of yourself, and it will stay with you no matter how you try to change it. It seems that if you even try to play differently, it upsets people even more...whether you are making a transition from a cold ice queen to a lamb, or a blindly following moron to a masterful playa, people seem to hold you to what initially was.
I will rue the day that I have to don a mask and play these games, because frankly...I like me. I like the connection I make with people and knowing they are getting the real me. And if they don't like me...well, gosh. Ouch. I don't like it...but I will most assuredly get over it, and probably when I turn my computer off. ;D
So on to the first episode, which essentially starts...mmmm, before Valentine's Day had even finished airing. It had always been up in the air whether or not I would play becuase the non-mastermind, always falling to the schemes and manipulations of others in me finished one place from the final five--the official All Star prerequisite. Jenne told me repeatedly she would not play All-Stars if I didn't. Gracie-Beth told me the same. Lucas-Tenzil was back and forth depending on who else would be playing. Taylor was always playing; Ellie refused from the get-go, so the chances looked good that I would be playing.
In one ear, I had Jenne telling me how good I was going to do and how she would never play against me again. Beth was telling me the same. Taylor, well we were buds...shouldn't we just assume we'd be together? This is where I found myself in a quandary. I had just been played by a group of people with an established trust and bond. You can argue with me till we are both blue in the face, but it is a given advantage however you look at it. I don't care if only certain members of a group are aware of identities from day one...if only one person is privy, the group is destined to gravitate together.
So this was my dilemma...I know how it felt to be bested by such bonds. Did I want that for myself in All-Stars? Did I want to ride the coat tails of that trust to the end of the game? The answer was NO. There can be no debate on how much I cared about Taylor, Jenne, and Beth, and I had grown to care for Tenzil going into this game. But I also wanted to get to know others that I had read about, even met throughout the year. Such people like Missie, JoJo, Jake, Isaac, Angie...I was most excited to get to know them.
So...I wanted to find my best interests in this game.
I didn't realize Jamie was playing the game until like a day before it started, so I wanted to turn over a new leaf there as well. Jamie and I were rivals three games over. I wanted to be partners with her in this game. So that was set. I had Beth in one ear telling me she never wanted to play against me again. I had her telling me who she wanted gone early. I had Jenne in another ear telling me she didn't want to play, and I didn't encourage her to. It would be easier for me if she didn't, especially if she didn't want to play. So why encourage her? But she played anyway.
I guess you could say I came into this game a total free agent with certain loyalties only to Jamie. I also came into this game wanting to be different than the loyal follower I was in Valentine's Day. I never questioned, I never tried to throw any weight around, I never wondered why certain people left the game when they did. I just assumed I was high in that "Fab Five" alliance and went with the flow. This time, I wanted to be a part of the decision making process so I would know what was going on at all times. Is that so wrong of me? Well...as episodes progress, we'll get into more of that later.
So now lets delve into my perspective of the game as it actually started. Jamie and I began planning immediately. She was my one and only spoken final two partner. Taylor began rattling off his plans to me, so I let him. Beth inched her way into an alliance with Jamie and I, telling us how she didn't want to be loyal to Taylor and Jenne, so we welcomed her in. We had no clue, as you saw, that Beth was already tight with JoJo, Chris, and Jenne, or as they so proudly referred to themselves as "The Bitch Four." Which leads me to what Jenne had always proposed to me since about April of this year.
Jenne: (Kyle's paraphrasing) I'm not playing the game hard. I'm just going to sit in my corner and watch the game go and help my friends along. I will even avoid strategy."
So, I took her at face value...which is what I did in Valentine's Day. Girl was playing from Day freakin' One. I beleived she was going to do as she said for about an hour into the game before Beth told me that she and Taylor had made up and they were keeping it a secret...even from me. That's when I knew Jenne was playing and that she would play as hard as she did Valentine's Day. My trust was completely gone at that point, and that lack of trust trickled over to Tenzil who proposed the same playing mechanics as Jenne. So do you blame me for thinking....yeah right? Tenzil and Jenne were tops on my "I do not trust" list, regardless of my friendships with them. So with this new lack of trust came my paranoia of the whole group of Jenne/Tenzil/Elisabeth/Chris (because I knew he was a real life friend of Jenne's and an SC'er at that). Beth I thought was loyal to me and separating herself from that group.
So let me get into the other people that I met in this first episode. Chris and I had an interesting first chat. About a year ago I messaged him out of the blue. I had read St. Patrick's Day and I had just met Taylor and Taylor said they were close friends. So, I thought a friend of Taylor's could be a friend of mine. Yeah...wasn't received well. So I left it at that, but Chris came apologizing to me our very first chat, the very first day of the game. Here was my first red flag on Mr. Christopher. I think to meet someone all the while spewing out praises and compliments screams ulterior motives, and this is exactly what I felt here. But I left it at that because it was too early. Jake I liked and we said we'd stick together, but for some reason we could never talk strategy. Missie, I liked, but didn't now if I could fully trust. I wanted to work with her, but she was very high on everyone's first boot list, for whatever reason. I wanted to stay close to her to see what she was doing. I knew I might need her against the barrier of SC'ers who Beth had already told me that not under any circumstance would she vote out Jenne, Taylor, Tenzil, Elisabeth, Christopher, Karen, Rob, Rupert, Shi-Ann, Colby, John Kerry, Micky Mouse, Tom Cruise.....you get the idea. The list was longer than the cast itself it seemed. So, yeah, I wanted to work with Missie despite what I told others and that she was high on the first boot list. Isaac and Jon had impacts on me as genuine people when I met them, but I couldn't strategize with them yet. Angie...Angie I wanted to work with and she seemed to want to work with Jamie, so I wanted to talk both of them up, get them on the same page, then jump in with them so as not to expose the Kyle/Jamie duo. And of course, there was Ryan, Rami, and Drew who I was most wary of because I had played a hand in backstabbing all three of them in Valentine's Day. I was sure they were coming back for Kyle blood first...even over Lucas. JoJo, I loved, and trusted her with every ounce of strategy I put into this game.
So, into the game...geez this is long. Taylor was feeding me all the information I needed, so I relayed everything back to Jamie and Beth to stay abreast of everything that was going on on the Missie front. Little did I know the Beth was relaying to the Bitch Four everything that was going on on the Kyle/Jamie front. Chris spent most all of this episode singing Kyle praises to my face and assuring me he thought Valentine's Day had been unfair and he wasn't going to be loyal to them Of course, I didn't believe this because of the whole praise thing, and I knew he and Jenne were real life hanging buddies. I knew he wasn't going to go against her or vice versa. So, Chris was on my watch list. Jamie was taken by him but I was sure to tell her...listen toots, he didn't like you when reading VD and he's feeding you the same crock he fed me. So she promised me she'd be careful. Anyway, Shaun comes up for first boot, and I'm cool with it. Lisa comes up for second "first" boot, and I'm not so cool with it. Why send her packing so early again? Further more I had talked her up and tried to rally her for Shaun...why would I want to go against her immediately? So as the surprise second boot came up, I was at a lost until Taylor mentioned Tenzil, and seconds later, so did Jake. At this point, I didn't particularly want Tenzil gone, but I could not vote for Lisa, and I had no clue so many votes would surface. I thought my vote would stand in a very small minority to be passed off as Ryan's or Rami's, even Taylor's. I had no idea it would almost go through.
In the mean time, Jamie was telling me...Lisa, Lisa, LISA and nodding till I thought her head would fall off. This is where my trust for her waned slightly. I struck me that she might be working with Tenzil more closely than she was letting on. Her reaction to his receiving any votes at all floored me. This is also where I gained a little bit of trust for Chris. His vote for Tenzil told me that perhaps he wasn't with "that" group as I had thought. So my defenses came down a notch. Not totally, but a notch.
Then I did something that got my hand slapped because I was not playing vintage Kyle. I lied. Until I could get numbers over them, I needed to be in good with the SC group and a vote for Tenzil would not be good with the SC group. So my vote was for Lisa. To Jake, my vote was for Tenzil, and this I thought would be the point where Kyle and Jake could officially trust each other with strategy. Little did I know that he was already deep with Chris and JoJo.
What a tangled web. And it started from day one.
Trust me, there will be so much more to come. If you have any questions on anything I may have left out, just fire away!
But for now...that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Another reason I decided to continue with these is because I enjoyed doing them. It was a release for me and I know at least some people enjoyed reading them. Furthemore, I like to keep a consistancy with a legacy or a series, if you will.
So I shall.
First let me say, that I discovered something that I never before understood. The inclination toward aliases. I have often harped on Beth about why she doesn't usually play as herself...and here I have discovered why. Jamie further sealed this to me after an intense discussion we had last night. You make a character out of yourself, and it will stay with you no matter how you try to change it. It seems that if you even try to play differently, it upsets people even more...whether you are making a transition from a cold ice queen to a lamb, or a blindly following moron to a masterful playa, people seem to hold you to what initially was.
I will rue the day that I have to don a mask and play these games, because frankly...I like me. I like the connection I make with people and knowing they are getting the real me. And if they don't like me...well, gosh. Ouch. I don't like it...but I will most assuredly get over it, and probably when I turn my computer off. ;D
So on to the first episode, which essentially starts...mmmm, before Valentine's Day had even finished airing. It had always been up in the air whether or not I would play becuase the non-mastermind, always falling to the schemes and manipulations of others in me finished one place from the final five--the official All Star prerequisite. Jenne told me repeatedly she would not play All-Stars if I didn't. Gracie-Beth told me the same. Lucas-Tenzil was back and forth depending on who else would be playing. Taylor was always playing; Ellie refused from the get-go, so the chances looked good that I would be playing.
In one ear, I had Jenne telling me how good I was going to do and how she would never play against me again. Beth was telling me the same. Taylor, well we were buds...shouldn't we just assume we'd be together? This is where I found myself in a quandary. I had just been played by a group of people with an established trust and bond. You can argue with me till we are both blue in the face, but it is a given advantage however you look at it. I don't care if only certain members of a group are aware of identities from day one...if only one person is privy, the group is destined to gravitate together.
So this was my dilemma...I know how it felt to be bested by such bonds. Did I want that for myself in All-Stars? Did I want to ride the coat tails of that trust to the end of the game? The answer was NO. There can be no debate on how much I cared about Taylor, Jenne, and Beth, and I had grown to care for Tenzil going into this game. But I also wanted to get to know others that I had read about, even met throughout the year. Such people like Missie, JoJo, Jake, Isaac, Angie...I was most excited to get to know them.
So...I wanted to find my best interests in this game.
I didn't realize Jamie was playing the game until like a day before it started, so I wanted to turn over a new leaf there as well. Jamie and I were rivals three games over. I wanted to be partners with her in this game. So that was set. I had Beth in one ear telling me she never wanted to play against me again. I had her telling me who she wanted gone early. I had Jenne in another ear telling me she didn't want to play, and I didn't encourage her to. It would be easier for me if she didn't, especially if she didn't want to play. So why encourage her? But she played anyway.
I guess you could say I came into this game a total free agent with certain loyalties only to Jamie. I also came into this game wanting to be different than the loyal follower I was in Valentine's Day. I never questioned, I never tried to throw any weight around, I never wondered why certain people left the game when they did. I just assumed I was high in that "Fab Five" alliance and went with the flow. This time, I wanted to be a part of the decision making process so I would know what was going on at all times. Is that so wrong of me? Well...as episodes progress, we'll get into more of that later.
So now lets delve into my perspective of the game as it actually started. Jamie and I began planning immediately. She was my one and only spoken final two partner. Taylor began rattling off his plans to me, so I let him. Beth inched her way into an alliance with Jamie and I, telling us how she didn't want to be loyal to Taylor and Jenne, so we welcomed her in. We had no clue, as you saw, that Beth was already tight with JoJo, Chris, and Jenne, or as they so proudly referred to themselves as "The Bitch Four." Which leads me to what Jenne had always proposed to me since about April of this year.
Jenne: (Kyle's paraphrasing) I'm not playing the game hard. I'm just going to sit in my corner and watch the game go and help my friends along. I will even avoid strategy."
So, I took her at face value...which is what I did in Valentine's Day. Girl was playing from Day freakin' One. I beleived she was going to do as she said for about an hour into the game before Beth told me that she and Taylor had made up and they were keeping it a secret...even from me. That's when I knew Jenne was playing and that she would play as hard as she did Valentine's Day. My trust was completely gone at that point, and that lack of trust trickled over to Tenzil who proposed the same playing mechanics as Jenne. So do you blame me for thinking....yeah right? Tenzil and Jenne were tops on my "I do not trust" list, regardless of my friendships with them. So with this new lack of trust came my paranoia of the whole group of Jenne/Tenzil/Elisabeth/Chris (because I knew he was a real life friend of Jenne's and an SC'er at that). Beth I thought was loyal to me and separating herself from that group.
So let me get into the other people that I met in this first episode. Chris and I had an interesting first chat. About a year ago I messaged him out of the blue. I had read St. Patrick's Day and I had just met Taylor and Taylor said they were close friends. So, I thought a friend of Taylor's could be a friend of mine. Yeah...wasn't received well. So I left it at that, but Chris came apologizing to me our very first chat, the very first day of the game. Here was my first red flag on Mr. Christopher. I think to meet someone all the while spewing out praises and compliments screams ulterior motives, and this is exactly what I felt here. But I left it at that because it was too early. Jake I liked and we said we'd stick together, but for some reason we could never talk strategy. Missie, I liked, but didn't now if I could fully trust. I wanted to work with her, but she was very high on everyone's first boot list, for whatever reason. I wanted to stay close to her to see what she was doing. I knew I might need her against the barrier of SC'ers who Beth had already told me that not under any circumstance would she vote out Jenne, Taylor, Tenzil, Elisabeth, Christopher, Karen, Rob, Rupert, Shi-Ann, Colby, John Kerry, Micky Mouse, Tom Cruise.....you get the idea. The list was longer than the cast itself it seemed. So, yeah, I wanted to work with Missie despite what I told others and that she was high on the first boot list. Isaac and Jon had impacts on me as genuine people when I met them, but I couldn't strategize with them yet. Angie...Angie I wanted to work with and she seemed to want to work with Jamie, so I wanted to talk both of them up, get them on the same page, then jump in with them so as not to expose the Kyle/Jamie duo. And of course, there was Ryan, Rami, and Drew who I was most wary of because I had played a hand in backstabbing all three of them in Valentine's Day. I was sure they were coming back for Kyle blood first...even over Lucas. JoJo, I loved, and trusted her with every ounce of strategy I put into this game.
So, into the game...geez this is long. Taylor was feeding me all the information I needed, so I relayed everything back to Jamie and Beth to stay abreast of everything that was going on on the Missie front. Little did I know the Beth was relaying to the Bitch Four everything that was going on on the Kyle/Jamie front. Chris spent most all of this episode singing Kyle praises to my face and assuring me he thought Valentine's Day had been unfair and he wasn't going to be loyal to them Of course, I didn't believe this because of the whole praise thing, and I knew he and Jenne were real life hanging buddies. I knew he wasn't going to go against her or vice versa. So, Chris was on my watch list. Jamie was taken by him but I was sure to tell her...listen toots, he didn't like you when reading VD and he's feeding you the same crock he fed me. So she promised me she'd be careful. Anyway, Shaun comes up for first boot, and I'm cool with it. Lisa comes up for second "first" boot, and I'm not so cool with it. Why send her packing so early again? Further more I had talked her up and tried to rally her for Shaun...why would I want to go against her immediately? So as the surprise second boot came up, I was at a lost until Taylor mentioned Tenzil, and seconds later, so did Jake. At this point, I didn't particularly want Tenzil gone, but I could not vote for Lisa, and I had no clue so many votes would surface. I thought my vote would stand in a very small minority to be passed off as Ryan's or Rami's, even Taylor's. I had no idea it would almost go through.
In the mean time, Jamie was telling me...Lisa, Lisa, LISA and nodding till I thought her head would fall off. This is where my trust for her waned slightly. I struck me that she might be working with Tenzil more closely than she was letting on. Her reaction to his receiving any votes at all floored me. This is also where I gained a little bit of trust for Chris. His vote for Tenzil told me that perhaps he wasn't with "that" group as I had thought. So my defenses came down a notch. Not totally, but a notch.
Then I did something that got my hand slapped because I was not playing vintage Kyle. I lied. Until I could get numbers over them, I needed to be in good with the SC group and a vote for Tenzil would not be good with the SC group. So my vote was for Lisa. To Jake, my vote was for Tenzil, and this I thought would be the point where Kyle and Jake could officially trust each other with strategy. Little did I know that he was already deep with Chris and JoJo.
What a tangled web. And it started from day one.
Trust me, there will be so much more to come. If you have any questions on anything I may have left out, just fire away!
But for now...that's the way the cookie crumbles.
